Ragu Bolognese

This is the kind of sauce that makes you want to get up in the middle 

of the night to eat leftovers! Go ahead. Life is short, but the nights are long.

INGREDIENTS:

• 4 oz. pancetta, cut into 1/2-inch cubes
• 3 large garlic cloves
• 5 Tablespoons butter
• 1 medium onion, finely chopped
• 1 medium carrot, finely chopped
• 1 large celery stalk, finely chopped
• 1 pound ground beef (80/20)
• 1 pound ground pork 
• 3 cups beef stock
• 1 cup dry white wine
• 1 teaspoon salt
• 1 pinch grated nutmeg
• 1 cup whole milk
• 2 Tablespoons tomato paste
• 1 cup tomato puree
• Freshly ground black pepper
• Freshly grated Parmigiano-Reggiano cheese, (optional)

DIRECTIONS:

I began by transforming pancetta and garlic into a smooth paste. Because I live in the modern world I used a food processor. I fried the paste in 3 TBS butter (!) until the fat was rendered and the metamorphosis complete. I chopped the Holy Trinity (celery, onion, and carrot) gloriously fine, and added that mishmash to the cauldron*. Damn, my friends - I was cookin'! I was turning base materials into gold.

When the veggie/fat seemed utterly transfigured, I plopped in a pound each of ground beef and pork. Fifteen minutes of chanting** browned the meat evenly. I imposed my will with a wooden spoon, chopping and hacking to break it into small pieces. 

I added wine, a pinch of nutmeg, salt, and whole milk. Well, I didn't actually have whole milk, so I used my fearsome powers to turn half and half and a little skim milk into whole. Don't judge me. For a few uncanny moments I feared I didn't have nutmeg. After ransacking the spice rack, I found it. Or maybe I materialized it? Who knows?

Meanwhile, on the other side of the stove I heated stock into which I dissolved tomato paste and puree. I folded the red liquid into the meat, bringing the heat up until it bubbled and spit. I covered the pot, lowered the heat, and simmered the whole mess for a few hours. I degreased the sauce once even though the recipe didn't ask me to. I just had to get rid of some of that grease. 

Before serving, I melted in two more tablespoons of the Philosopher's stone*** and added 20 turns ground pepper. That's what the recipe asked for, 20 turns. I obeyed.  

*pot

**swearing 

***butter